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Stan's avatar

‘No’.

I love it, it is, and has been for a long time one of my favorite words. I find myself using it a lot more often lately than I used to. I used the word “no“ when we were required to take the jab over a year ago to keep our jobs. I simply said no. No, I’m not going to take the jab at the threat of losing my job, that would be a crime against humanity under the Nuremberg code; and no, I’m not going to apply for a “religious exemption“ because that would be a religious test to keep my job And that’s a violation of my fundamental freedom as an American.

So “no” is a beautiful, clean, powerful word. In fact, it is the defining word of a free human being. A slave can never say “no”. Only a free person can.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

"...it is the defining word of a free human being. A slave can never say “no”. Only a three person can."

What a perfect point - I wish I thought of writing that!

Good on you. Were you able t keep your job?

Thanks for the comment.

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Stan's avatar

My pleasure. I also corrected the “Three” and made it a “free”

Yes, I was. Several days later I received my exemption.!

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denise ward's avatar

I truly love you're last line. Perfection!

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

🙏💕

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Leslie Murphree's avatar

We’ll just what the.... (was going to say doctor ordered)

but no to the doctors 🤣just what I needed, besides coffee, this morning. God Bless you & your wisdom & gift of writing.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

lol. Thank you! Best.

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Laura Kasner's avatar

Kathleen. The sentiments my sister said here are mine as well.

I’d like to get your take on something.

I commented to Jeff Childers article today (it’s one of the first 10). I got many replies to it. Some are commenting that they LOVE that they are alone. That they choose to be alone. I find that odd since they bother to read comments and reply to them. Does that not indicate a need for other people? A need for a “tribe” of kindred spirits? Wouldn’t it be more life affirming to be in the physical presence of these like-minded people? I find this so confounding. Would love your take. Perhaps another of your profound prose on the subject?

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Hi Laura,

I don't know the answer. Though I would say - and I haven't read those comments - the substack community is a community despite its limitations. I know some people who genuinely prefer to be alone a lot. So maybe for them, they get the experience of 'like-minded' via online community and that's enough.

I get more of the kindred spirit piece with people on substack than in my physical life. I do see people, but we don't really discuss much. (Just really trying to keep those friendships going for when they do see what's been happening.)

Interesting question!

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Laura Kasner's avatar

My best friend - who is awake to the lies - and I have been friends for 40 years. I always thought of her as my soulmate. We no longer speak. It makes her uncomfortable that I’m a soldier in this war fighting for truth. She doesn’t like the person I have become. She has lost nothing these past 3 years. But she’s never tried to desperately share the truth with anyone either. She’s risked nothing, so it’s impossible for her to understand. I sent her a letter explaining how I felt - where I thought God was guiding me. She said my letter was self-absorbed and self-righteous. Makes my heart so very heavy. I focus on all the new friendships I’ve made through the Ohio Freedom Fighter meetings, my church and Bible study. And more profoundly, the closeness my twin sister and I have gained through all this. She NEVER judges me or admonishes me. But she has also had profound losses. I guess that makes all the difference.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

I think that's exactly right - those who got through the last 3 years without that experience of profound loss, simply do not get it. Maybe they can't. Hopefully eventually, they will. My oldest friend - also 40 years - we text, we are nice to each other, but we don't really see each other much anymore. I found some peace with it over the last year.

She's not awake to what's happening, and doesn't understand why I lost it when she told me she thought it was okay, that I couldn't go to NY because I wasn't vaxxed. (early 2022) Doesn't get it still. In her life, life went on just fine. But her day is coming. Her son works and Pfizer and she was proud of all that. Her day is coming. I want to be open and helpful when it does.

As for your friend's comment on being self-absorbed and self-righteous, well... it's easier for her to make you wrong - who are actually doing something you felt guided to do - than look at herself sitting on the sidelines.

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Laura Kasner's avatar

Thank you Kathleen.

And I know we will both be there for these friends when that day comes.

My friend is “luke warm” as the Bible talks about. And she studies the Bible every day. 😔

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Kelliann's avatar

Would love to be able to personally meet and congregate with many here in our substack tribe💞💞

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

I feel the same, Kelliann.

It's very hopeful isn't it - to see so many aware people who care in one spot? 💕

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Laura Kasner's avatar

I have been blessed to meet two people on substack that live in my state. One is 3 hours away but we collaborated on a project. We created a survey for embalmers. The results were published in this substack authors article: https://amidwesterndoctor.substack.com/p/do-the-mysterious-fibrous-clots-really

The other person lives nearby and we will be meeting with one of our state senators next month to present evidence of the harms of the shots.

I am grateful for this platform. It has given me an opportunity to actually do something to spread truth instead of feeling angry and distraught over this nightmare.

God saw to it that I saw the comments from these two people. 🥰

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Wow that is really amazing, Laura.

Yes you are actually doing something that makes a difference, and making friends in the process. I would love to hear how it goes with your state senator.

Best.🥰

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Kelliann's avatar

Please say you are in MI

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Laura Kasner's avatar

Close. NE Ohio

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Laura Kasner's avatar

Amen sissy!

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

🙏😘

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The Critical Middle's avatar

Love this. F no!! I wrote about similar themes below. Boundaries! Critical thinking! Courage! May they all make a rabid comeback.

https://open.substack.com/pub/thecriticalmiddle/p/oh-yeah-says-who

https://open.substack.com/pub/thecriticalmiddle/p/take-back-your-mind

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thanks! Appreciate the links. I'll check it out.

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SheThinksLiberty's avatar

Wonderful piece, Kathleen. I'm a big fan of saying "No." Will cross post.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thank you so much! I appreciate it.😘

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KW NORTON's avatar

Good post thanks. Understanding how to say no is understanding how to set limits for ourselves and others. Learning how, when and why to say no helps us say yes to a meaningful life.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thanks - I'm with you.

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SheThinksLiberty's avatar

Yup. 100%, KW.

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SadieJay's avatar

One hundred percent agree. I have always been the NO person. Just NO. Why? Because. Just NO. But the pressure to say yes on all this is hellish. I was the last of my friends to get a smart phone and they were all so exasperated with me, but used to my ways. I went for a girls weekend with 10 other gals and 60% of the group had tattoos. I did not and would not, because everyone else is doing it. THAT is why I don't have one. It is also why I don't have other things, because every one else is doing it and I don't want to be the same. There have been days when a power outage is most welcome. I have gone out to the box and turned off the power to the house on purpose because I. Just. Can't. Stand. It. Well written Kathleen and once again managed to capture exactly how I am feeling and put it into words.♥♥♥ You are one gifted lady.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thank you Sadie Jay. I love that - turning the power off! Great idea. I might have to try that.

So appreciate you; your generous, fighting spirit as well as your insightful writings .🥰

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Rick Larson's avatar

Yes to no!

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

👍😊

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Patricia Russell's avatar

"No is a Yes to the future of humanity."

"No is really a Yes to life."

Beautiful and empowering truths. I will remember them as I travel through my days feeling like a stranger in a strange land in a country and world that no longer feels like my own.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thank you, Patricia. I know that feeling... stranger in a strange (once familiar) land.

Something new is coming for sure. To assure it is not robots in charge who keep an eye on the remaining humans in their 15 minute cities, we better get better at 'No."

Thank you for the comment.

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Rob (c137)'s avatar

Aseem Malhotra is beyond stupid. Why? Because he wasn't one of those doctors that blindly trusted pharma, until convid.

He knew that statins were bad. He questioned big pharma.

But then he jumped on the convid vax train as if a new technology is automatically safe?!

And then he took so long to read the available data about the shots, including Pfizers own horrible trial data?

He took so long to speak out about his father's death being linked to the jabs.

Maybe he's just a big coward!

(From https://leftlockdownsceptics.com/alleged-cia-involvement-in-jfk-assassination-goes-mainstream-so-now-what/ )

"And then there is the psychological effect of the Big Lie which is axiomatic in gaslighting. The paradox here is that the bigger the lie, the harder it is for the mind to bridge the gulf between perceived reality and the lie that authority figures are painting as truth. I believe that the prospect of being deceived evinces a primitive emotional response on a par with staring death in the face. We are hard-wired to fear deception because we have evolved to interpret it as an existential threat. That’s why deception can elicit the same emotional response as the miscalculation of a serious physical threat. Lies told to us don’t always bear the same cost as a misjudged red light, but the primitive part of the brain can’t make this distinction and we rely on cerebral mediation for a more appropriate but delayed response. And in the long run, the lie is often just as dangerous as the physical threat. Many government whoppers – ‘safe and effective’ – do cost lives.

To avoid the death-like experience of being deceived, a mental defence is erected to deny that the lie is happening."

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Great insights.

"...paradox here is that the bigger the lie, the harder it is for the mind to bridge the gulf between perceived reality and the lie that authority figures are painting as truth." Indeed!

And

"To avoid the death-like experience of being deceived, a mental defence is erected to deny that the lie is happening." Well, this surely explains the persistence of normies.

Thank you!

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Vinnie's avatar

Great observation as succinct and effective as the two letter word!

Funny story:

Was referred to a functional nutritionist. As the appointment day approached… received an e-mail to complete a questionnaire online.

The day prior to the appointment I opened the e-mail…

Well it was a 12 page interview!

Felt uneasy about it. Antenna went up.

Phoned and cancelled the appointment.

5 minutes after a phone call.

After a brief introduction the caller inquired as to “WHY”

I cancelled my appointment.

I replied: “I changed my mind”

Silence.

“Why” was the response.

“Because I want to".

Felt I needed not to explain to a complete stranger ANYTHING....

The Person hung on the line completely perplexed.

I asked:

“Is there anything else?”

“But… Why?”

Was the response.

“It’s my choice to say no thank you.”

And hung up.

🤷🏻‍♀️

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Nice story. Exactly right.

I had a different version of that story at the bank a couple months ago.

Teller said, " Oh glad you're here. I need some information to complete your client profile." He then proceeded to ask me a series of questions. When he finished, I said. "No thanks." He looked perplexed. "I'm sorry? I need this information."

"Oh, no, you don't. That's my information. I don't want to give it to. you."

(He doesn't even look at me anymore.)

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denise ward's avatar

I may be funny but I would have said why I was saying no because I feel we have to help each other learn. Sending 12 page questionnaires is rather taking advantage of people's time. And that's one thing most people are totally clueless about - they think that other people's time is for them to trifle with. It's so common now for other people's time to be totally overlooked.

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Vinnie's avatar

denise, wonder if that would had made their head explode?

Hey, wasn't there a dance song..."It's my Perogative?" LOL

T

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Sun in Capricorn's avatar

Yes, it sure feels weird living among the clueless, although I sometimes wonder if they, too, feel the seismic civilizational shifts but have neither the language nor the inclination to express their thoughts. In my less philosophical moments, I suspect most of them truly are oblivious of the profound strangeness that pervades everything now. Why do we see it but they don't? No one talks about the injections or the lockdowns or the masks anymore here in Melbourne. It is as if it never happened. That in itself adds to the all-encompassing weirdness.

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ExcessDeathsAU's avatar

I'm still talking about it. And I think about the man who set himself on fire in Melbourne too.

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Ed Brenegar's avatar

Kathleen, I agree with you, and add that saying Yes all the time can be equally problematic. I wrote a short book about this called May Your No Be a Yes. In the book, I recounted a conversation that I had with a woman is a client and friend.

"Me: The idea … is that you want every no that you make to be a yes towards something that is important or valuable to you. … you're saying no to affirm a yes. … Does that make sense?

Jean: Yes.

Me: Why is that important to you?

Jean: Women are yes people, and we say yes to everything, and so we lose our purpose.

Me: Do you lose your identity too?

Jean: Yeah.

A few moments later ...

Me: How much time during the course of the day would be saved if this relation between yes and no was healthy? Any idea?

Jean: It’s not how many hours during the day, it's years. I don't think you can equate it in a day because, over time, days to moms and women don't exist. It's like, the days are long, the years are short. Right? That's what you always hear. …

So every day you're thinking, what have I done today? You've said yes to lunch. You said yes to that person ... yes to PTA. …

I don't think hours in the day exist for women because unless you are someone who has every minute planned and is okay with the control that you lose when your child gets sick or whatever, then those days run into each other. So, our sense of purpose over time is affected for sure. … I talk to people all the time who say, I volunteered for this, I'm on the committee for my child's fundraiser. All these fundraisers that everyone's doing... Do we need to do the fundraiser? Just write a check or don't... And it's all about the auctions and this stuff, and it gets ... the pressures … the social pressures. … as a mother, as a working mom, it's hard to manage. … They've had it with their husband, or they're exhausted by their children. They've had it with their husband because he hasn't played a role in these daily decisions of saying yes and no. Right? Men have their purpose. Women have a purpose too, but it’s different."

You can tell that I was writing specifically, but not exclusively, to women. Later in the book, I wrote.

"The idea of making every No decision a Yes resonates deeply with people. You can see it in Jean’s response. You can say No because you are really saying Yes to something else. This is not just a need that women have, but every man does also. We both need to be able to distinguish between what is important and essential in our lives and what is not.

Look behind the words of my conversation with Jean above, there is a truth that many of us do not want to face. It is the reality that many of our decisions are made to be amenable to others. Social conformity has a powerful hold on us. It means that much of our lives are lived complying with the expectations of others. While this is true for both men and women, I believe that women live with a greater burden because of their focus on relationships. This is why saying “Let every No be a Yes’” resonates so deeply with them."

This is an important topic that needs more conversation. Thanks for bringing it up.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Excellent, Ed, thank you for elaborating. I really hope I didn't unconsciously steal the title from your book!

I agree - the amenable piece is very relevant. I did a post on that awhile back - Bewitched - that speaks to that notion as well. And, yes. Needs more conversation, so thank you for your post.

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Ed Brenegar's avatar

Oh, I’m glad that we both had the same idea. Two or three more people and we’ve got a movement going.

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Mary Poindexter McLaughlin's avatar

Discernment is everything! Saying "no" in the context of theatre improv, for an extreme example, is deadly to a scene. It literally dies right before your eyes. But saying "no" to anyone who is attempting to exert control over one's sovereignty? Hell yes. Thank you for this essay, Kathleen.

And thanks for the comment, Ed! The baked-in "be amenable" dictum still haunts me, though I'm getting better and better at letting it go. The last few years have been a master class in that!

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Hell yes to the right hell no!

I still work on that too. Gets in deep. And same, the last few years have given us lots of opportunity to let it go.

Thanks, Mary.

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Mary Poindexter McLaughlin's avatar

I want that on a t-shirt: "Hell yes to the right hell no!"

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ExcessDeathsAU's avatar

"No" is a complete sentence!

Bravo another cool drink of water in the desert from Kathleen.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thank you.🙏

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Gary Sharpe's avatar

Yes! Yes! Yes! to saying No! I really think you are onto something here. Especially as Chris Martenson synchronously did a post on "withdrawing our consent" (unfortunately behind a pay wall over on Peak Prosperity https://peakprosperity.com/we-reclaim-our-power-by-withdrawing-our-consent/ ). Disobedience and setting boundaries. I am thinking now of the user agreements and the terms of service/terms & conditions we sign, and what my be buried in them,...

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Thanks Gary. It may well be our collective super power. Which I know, many have been pointing out a long time.

I tend to ignore those user agreement - because you know, you need the updated version to run on your computer, etc. - but you're right. What are they burying inside them? Probably a lot of rights-abusing language. It reminds me of Katherine Watt's work and how our rights have been undermined- under-our-noses- in all those legislative bills no one reads.

Good to know Martenson is on the same track. Would be good to see some collective No-saying pick up momentum. I don't know why for instance we wouldn't stop paying taxes given the complete lack of representation. (Aside from fear of being jailed and fined of course.)

Appreciate the comment!

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Gary Sharpe's avatar

When Thatcher brought in the "Poll Tax" - flat rate of community tax not based on income - the rich would pay the same as the poor - widespread protests put astop to it. I don't think that would happen now - indeed, the 15 minute cities going ahead is an example of this - I think we have become more compliant/docile...

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Sadly, I agree. We have and we live with those consequences.

The 'we' in that, however, is in play. Do enough of us take the leap that we've been under attack and viewed as enemies of our own governments? It's a big leap for many. How many need to see it? What happens when they do? I don't know.

But I feel certain life won't allow this control grid to succeed. (Admittedly some might say that is denial on my part.)

Life finds a way.

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TFish's avatar

I’ll shout my No! steadfast, right alongside you.

No to tyranny.

Yes to loving ourselves and others.

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

Big smiles here. Thank you, TFish. Honored to stand with you.

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TFish's avatar

✊🏾

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TAM's avatar

My motto: Oh HELL no!

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Kathleen Devanney. A human.'s avatar

👍 May that sentiment spread far and wide!

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