The matrix doesn’t sleep. Kathleen Devanney's Newsletter is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. It’s easy to get sucked in. The non-stop propaganda of TV screens; social media endlessly streaming via laptops and phones or… however else you find yourself sucked in. (And if you sleep with your smart phone in your room, you get programmed all night long, know it or not. The broadcast is continuous.)
I love it, it is, and has been for a long time one of my favorite words. I find myself using it a lot more often lately than I used to. I used the word “no“ when we were required to take the jab over a year ago to keep our jobs. I simply said no. No, I’m not going to take the jab at the threat of losing my job, that would be a crime against humanity under the Nuremberg code; and no, I’m not going to apply for a “religious exemption“ because that would be a religious test to keep my job And that’s a violation of my fundamental freedom as an American.
So “no” is a beautiful, clean, powerful word. In fact, it is the defining word of a free human being. A slave can never say “no”. Only a free person can.
Good post thanks. Understanding how to say no is understanding how to set limits for ourselves and others. Learning how, when and why to say no helps us say yes to a meaningful life.
One hundred percent agree. I have always been the NO person. Just NO. Why? Because. Just NO. But the pressure to say yes on all this is hellish. I was the last of my friends to get a smart phone and they were all so exasperated with me, but used to my ways. I went for a girls weekend with 10 other gals and 60% of the group had tattoos. I did not and would not, because everyone else is doing it. THAT is why I don't have one. It is also why I don't have other things, because every one else is doing it and I don't want to be the same. There have been days when a power outage is most welcome. I have gone out to the box and turned off the power to the house on purpose because I. Just. Can't. Stand. It. Well written Kathleen and once again managed to capture exactly how I am feeling and put it into words.♥♥♥ You are one gifted lady.
Beautiful and empowering truths. I will remember them as I travel through my days feeling like a stranger in a strange land in a country and world that no longer feels like my own.
"And then there is the psychological effect of the Big Lie which is axiomatic in gaslighting. The paradox here is that the bigger the lie, the harder it is for the mind to bridge the gulf between perceived reality and the lie that authority figures are painting as truth. I believe that the prospect of being deceived evinces a primitive emotional response on a par with staring death in the face. We are hard-wired to fear deception because we have evolved to interpret it as an existential threat. That’s why deception can elicit the same emotional response as the miscalculation of a serious physical threat. Lies told to us don’t always bear the same cost as a misjudged red light, but the primitive part of the brain can’t make this distinction and we rely on cerebral mediation for a more appropriate but delayed response. And in the long run, the lie is often just as dangerous as the physical threat. Many government whoppers – ‘safe and effective’ – do cost lives.
To avoid the death-like experience of being deceived, a mental defence is erected to deny that the lie is happening."
Yes, it sure feels weird living among the clueless, although I sometimes wonder if they, too, feel the seismic civilizational shifts but have neither the language nor the inclination to express their thoughts. In my less philosophical moments, I suspect most of them truly are oblivious of the profound strangeness that pervades everything now. Why do we see it but they don't? No one talks about the injections or the lockdowns or the masks anymore here in Melbourne. It is as if it never happened. That in itself adds to the all-encompassing weirdness.
Kathleen, I agree with you, and add that saying Yes all the time can be equally problematic. I wrote a short book about this called May Your No Be a Yes. In the book, I recounted a conversation that I had with a woman is a client and friend.
"Me: The idea … is that you want every no that you make to be a yes towards something that is important or valuable to you. … you're saying no to affirm a yes. … Does that make sense?
Jean: Yes.
Me: Why is that important to you?
Jean: Women are yes people, and we say yes to everything, and so we lose our purpose.
Me: Do you lose your identity too?
Jean: Yeah.
A few moments later ...
Me: How much time during the course of the day would be saved if this relation between yes and no was healthy? Any idea?
Jean: It’s not how many hours during the day, it's years. I don't think you can equate it in a day because, over time, days to moms and women don't exist. It's like, the days are long, the years are short. Right? That's what you always hear. …
So every day you're thinking, what have I done today? You've said yes to lunch. You said yes to that person ... yes to PTA. …
I don't think hours in the day exist for women because unless you are someone who has every minute planned and is okay with the control that you lose when your child gets sick or whatever, then those days run into each other. So, our sense of purpose over time is affected for sure. … I talk to people all the time who say, I volunteered for this, I'm on the committee for my child's fundraiser. All these fundraisers that everyone's doing... Do we need to do the fundraiser? Just write a check or don't... And it's all about the auctions and this stuff, and it gets ... the pressures … the social pressures. … as a mother, as a working mom, it's hard to manage. … They've had it with their husband, or they're exhausted by their children. They've had it with their husband because he hasn't played a role in these daily decisions of saying yes and no. Right? Men have their purpose. Women have a purpose too, but it’s different."
You can tell that I was writing specifically, but not exclusively, to women. Later in the book, I wrote.
"The idea of making every No decision a Yes resonates deeply with people. You can see it in Jean’s response. You can say No because you are really saying Yes to something else. This is not just a need that women have, but every man does also. We both need to be able to distinguish between what is important and essential in our lives and what is not.
Look behind the words of my conversation with Jean above, there is a truth that many of us do not want to face. It is the reality that many of our decisions are made to be amenable to others. Social conformity has a powerful hold on us. It means that much of our lives are lived complying with the expectations of others. While this is true for both men and women, I believe that women live with a greater burden because of their focus on relationships. This is why saying “Let every No be a Yes’” resonates so deeply with them."
This is an important topic that needs more conversation. Thanks for bringing it up.
Yes! Yes! Yes! to saying No! I really think you are onto something here. Especially as Chris Martenson synchronously did a post on "withdrawing our consent" (unfortunately behind a pay wall over on Peak Prosperity https://peakprosperity.com/we-reclaim-our-power-by-withdrawing-our-consent/ ). Disobedience and setting boundaries. I am thinking now of the user agreements and the terms of service/terms & conditions we sign, and what my be buried in them,...
‘No’.
I love it, it is, and has been for a long time one of my favorite words. I find myself using it a lot more often lately than I used to. I used the word “no“ when we were required to take the jab over a year ago to keep our jobs. I simply said no. No, I’m not going to take the jab at the threat of losing my job, that would be a crime against humanity under the Nuremberg code; and no, I’m not going to apply for a “religious exemption“ because that would be a religious test to keep my job And that’s a violation of my fundamental freedom as an American.
So “no” is a beautiful, clean, powerful word. In fact, it is the defining word of a free human being. A slave can never say “no”. Only a free person can.
We’ll just what the.... (was going to say doctor ordered)
but no to the doctors 🤣just what I needed, besides coffee, this morning. God Bless you & your wisdom & gift of writing.
Love this. F no!! I wrote about similar themes below. Boundaries! Critical thinking! Courage! May they all make a rabid comeback.
https://open.substack.com/pub/thecriticalmiddle/p/oh-yeah-says-who
https://open.substack.com/pub/thecriticalmiddle/p/take-back-your-mind
Wonderful piece, Kathleen. I'm a big fan of saying "No." Will cross post.
Good post thanks. Understanding how to say no is understanding how to set limits for ourselves and others. Learning how, when and why to say no helps us say yes to a meaningful life.
One hundred percent agree. I have always been the NO person. Just NO. Why? Because. Just NO. But the pressure to say yes on all this is hellish. I was the last of my friends to get a smart phone and they were all so exasperated with me, but used to my ways. I went for a girls weekend with 10 other gals and 60% of the group had tattoos. I did not and would not, because everyone else is doing it. THAT is why I don't have one. It is also why I don't have other things, because every one else is doing it and I don't want to be the same. There have been days when a power outage is most welcome. I have gone out to the box and turned off the power to the house on purpose because I. Just. Can't. Stand. It. Well written Kathleen and once again managed to capture exactly how I am feeling and put it into words.♥♥♥ You are one gifted lady.
Yes to no!
"No is a Yes to the future of humanity."
"No is really a Yes to life."
Beautiful and empowering truths. I will remember them as I travel through my days feeling like a stranger in a strange land in a country and world that no longer feels like my own.
Aseem Malhotra is beyond stupid. Why? Because he wasn't one of those doctors that blindly trusted pharma, until convid.
He knew that statins were bad. He questioned big pharma.
But then he jumped on the convid vax train as if a new technology is automatically safe?!
And then he took so long to read the available data about the shots, including Pfizers own horrible trial data?
He took so long to speak out about his father's death being linked to the jabs.
Maybe he's just a big coward!
(From https://leftlockdownsceptics.com/alleged-cia-involvement-in-jfk-assassination-goes-mainstream-so-now-what/ )
"And then there is the psychological effect of the Big Lie which is axiomatic in gaslighting. The paradox here is that the bigger the lie, the harder it is for the mind to bridge the gulf between perceived reality and the lie that authority figures are painting as truth. I believe that the prospect of being deceived evinces a primitive emotional response on a par with staring death in the face. We are hard-wired to fear deception because we have evolved to interpret it as an existential threat. That’s why deception can elicit the same emotional response as the miscalculation of a serious physical threat. Lies told to us don’t always bear the same cost as a misjudged red light, but the primitive part of the brain can’t make this distinction and we rely on cerebral mediation for a more appropriate but delayed response. And in the long run, the lie is often just as dangerous as the physical threat. Many government whoppers – ‘safe and effective’ – do cost lives.
To avoid the death-like experience of being deceived, a mental defence is erected to deny that the lie is happening."
Great observation as succinct and effective as the two letter word!
Funny story:
Was referred to a functional nutritionist. As the appointment day approached… received an e-mail to complete a questionnaire online.
The day prior to the appointment I opened the e-mail…
Well it was a 12 page interview!
Felt uneasy about it. Antenna went up.
Phoned and cancelled the appointment.
5 minutes after a phone call.
After a brief introduction the caller inquired as to “WHY”
I cancelled my appointment.
I replied: “I changed my mind”
Silence.
“Why” was the response.
“Because I want to".
Felt I needed not to explain to a complete stranger ANYTHING....
The Person hung on the line completely perplexed.
I asked:
“Is there anything else?”
“But… Why?”
Was the response.
“It’s my choice to say no thank you.”
And hung up.
🤷🏻♀️
Yes, it sure feels weird living among the clueless, although I sometimes wonder if they, too, feel the seismic civilizational shifts but have neither the language nor the inclination to express their thoughts. In my less philosophical moments, I suspect most of them truly are oblivious of the profound strangeness that pervades everything now. Why do we see it but they don't? No one talks about the injections or the lockdowns or the masks anymore here in Melbourne. It is as if it never happened. That in itself adds to the all-encompassing weirdness.
Kathleen, I agree with you, and add that saying Yes all the time can be equally problematic. I wrote a short book about this called May Your No Be a Yes. In the book, I recounted a conversation that I had with a woman is a client and friend.
"Me: The idea … is that you want every no that you make to be a yes towards something that is important or valuable to you. … you're saying no to affirm a yes. … Does that make sense?
Jean: Yes.
Me: Why is that important to you?
Jean: Women are yes people, and we say yes to everything, and so we lose our purpose.
Me: Do you lose your identity too?
Jean: Yeah.
A few moments later ...
Me: How much time during the course of the day would be saved if this relation between yes and no was healthy? Any idea?
Jean: It’s not how many hours during the day, it's years. I don't think you can equate it in a day because, over time, days to moms and women don't exist. It's like, the days are long, the years are short. Right? That's what you always hear. …
So every day you're thinking, what have I done today? You've said yes to lunch. You said yes to that person ... yes to PTA. …
I don't think hours in the day exist for women because unless you are someone who has every minute planned and is okay with the control that you lose when your child gets sick or whatever, then those days run into each other. So, our sense of purpose over time is affected for sure. … I talk to people all the time who say, I volunteered for this, I'm on the committee for my child's fundraiser. All these fundraisers that everyone's doing... Do we need to do the fundraiser? Just write a check or don't... And it's all about the auctions and this stuff, and it gets ... the pressures … the social pressures. … as a mother, as a working mom, it's hard to manage. … They've had it with their husband, or they're exhausted by their children. They've had it with their husband because he hasn't played a role in these daily decisions of saying yes and no. Right? Men have their purpose. Women have a purpose too, but it’s different."
You can tell that I was writing specifically, but not exclusively, to women. Later in the book, I wrote.
"The idea of making every No decision a Yes resonates deeply with people. You can see it in Jean’s response. You can say No because you are really saying Yes to something else. This is not just a need that women have, but every man does also. We both need to be able to distinguish between what is important and essential in our lives and what is not.
Look behind the words of my conversation with Jean above, there is a truth that many of us do not want to face. It is the reality that many of our decisions are made to be amenable to others. Social conformity has a powerful hold on us. It means that much of our lives are lived complying with the expectations of others. While this is true for both men and women, I believe that women live with a greater burden because of their focus on relationships. This is why saying “Let every No be a Yes’” resonates so deeply with them."
This is an important topic that needs more conversation. Thanks for bringing it up.
"No" is a complete sentence!
Bravo another cool drink of water in the desert from Kathleen.
Yes! Yes! Yes! to saying No! I really think you are onto something here. Especially as Chris Martenson synchronously did a post on "withdrawing our consent" (unfortunately behind a pay wall over on Peak Prosperity https://peakprosperity.com/we-reclaim-our-power-by-withdrawing-our-consent/ ). Disobedience and setting boundaries. I am thinking now of the user agreements and the terms of service/terms & conditions we sign, and what my be buried in them,...
I’ll shout my No! steadfast, right alongside you.
No to tyranny.
Yes to loving ourselves and others.
My motto: Oh HELL no!