What Is...

Two Anecdotes

The morning light graces everything it touches. Birds welcome the new day - as always - though today I register a quality of praise in their song which has me wondering if I’m only now hearing what’s always been there or if I am adding that quality in somehow?

Either way - it’s lovely.

The growing light gently changes the color of the golden grass, the dried hydrangea blossoms and the houses on my street, transforming the world in its daily ritual. Just noticing opens up a space - an undercurrent - beneath whatever my mind might latch on to. That still place beneath the choppy waters of the mind. We all know it.

We’re not here to just call out the balls and strikes of someone else’s game, or keep score in the stands.

This still undercurrent is always present - waiting. I don’t want to name it - naming separates things - necessary and helpful in communicating - but also acts as obstacle to simply experiencing what is.

What is.

So many claims on what is going on, what is happening, what is the meaning behind all this?

The answers that bubble up from this undercurrent can feel at odds with the answers you find in the turbulent waters above. Translating insights out of stillness easily sound disconnected, simplistic or just beside the point.

As a writer this has been my challenge lately. We’re in the midst of a global game with significant consequences and many compelling players but all of it feels less and less real. Even as spectators, who to cheer on is often in doubt and just because someone claims to be on team A doesn’t mean they aren’t secretly on team B. (or C, or D…)

Because it’s nearly impossible to gauge what is actually going on, I’m spending less time in the choppy waters at the surface - and finding more value in that space underneath.

I’m not ignoring it though. Invitations abound to lock in one interpretation or another on endless stories. (However temporary those interpretations may prove to be.)

RFK Jr has made some recent headlines, upsetting truthers on his mixed response to the measles outbreak - which Celia Faber has suggested is likely manufactured to box him in. Also, these recent, comments on antisemitism. It’s left many of his once-hopeful supporters wondering what is going on. Then this - the elimination of public comments from HHS has even more of his supporters scratching their heads.

The spectators will speculate and various takes will clash; some rationalizing, some attacking, most somewhere in between.

I’m not convinced any of it really matters aside from it being necessary prelude to our eventual realization that it’s up to us - we-the-people - who must ultimately decide what we want this world to be. I don’t know much but I do know forfeiting that decision wouldn’t be good for us.

Isn’t that really the crux of it? The inevitable move we must make from watching the game to taking the field and making our own rules?

We’re not just spectators - this is our story, our lives too. Even if that story is happening in a global context that resembles a chaos-ensuing tornado spewing out swirls of confusion and threatening destruction. A lot of the machinations behind the manufactured world just have to fall apart.

Alongside all that, our story is also happening in mystery and beauty. Crazy stuff aside, there’s no need to miss that part.

Our current concoction of mayhem and uncertainty turns out to be a perfect recipe for squeezing us right out of our comfort zones and assumptions and hopefully landing us somewhere more steady. Welcoming and enduring. Maybe some where like this:

If getting comfortable in uncertainty is a main theme going forward then maybe discovering how to find simple pleasures in the midst of that is a good idea.

To that end I offer two work anecdotes (one that embodies this sentiment and one that doesn’t.) Small examples of how we curate our reality through these confusing times - even when we don’t know it.

First anecdote:

I recently played a video for the residents at the housing authority where I work, during our monthly meeting. I like to include short videos on various topics I hope they’ll find helpful - benefits of creativity, exercise, simple practices that improve health, etc.

This video was Gregg Braden on heart-brain coherence which I’ve covered on my stack. I knew the subject would likely feel a bit out-there to most. Ideally, a post-video conversation spontaneously happens however with this subject, not so much. The meeting wrapped up and one woman - we’ll call her Becka - came over to say she liked Braden’s work and appreciated the video.

Great.

After stating she understood the importance of gratitude and compassion, Becka quickly qualified the statement, by saying she couldn’t extend either to ‘MAGA folks’. I registered the not-so-subtle litmus test she carried around with her.

Not great.

No getting away from the political divide I guess. Navigating it can feel like driving through a many pot-holed road that if you stay on will ultimately lead you off a cliff. I wanted to pull over and so attempted to re-direct her attention to something more neutral. But no.

This turned into a lengthy discussion, which another woman eventually joined in. Skipping the details - suffice to say - our takes on what is going on, weren’t simpatico. Still, I found every opportunity to validate her feelings without agreeing with her conclusions.

She asserted: Now that we have a nazi-racist-narcissist-misogynist-fascist-wanna-be king as president, this means that most Americans are clearly bigots who are more concerned about the price of eggs than they are the rights of people. (That’s pretty close to verbatim.)

She genuinely believes this and believing it, sadly, finds the world understandably terrifying.

I suggested her conclusion might be overstating things a tad and presenting a false dichotomy while simplifying something more complex. Didn’t penetrate. I said it was not my experience since I found most people to be good and wanting basically the same things. Head-shake reply.

She assured me if I didn’t share her conclusions it was because I was naïve and would be given I’m a straight, white, middle-class, female. These descriptors were followed by, I’m not judging you about that, Kathleen, it’s not your fault. (Oh, thanks.)

I wanted to tell her (a gay, white, lower class, female btw) she was allowing non-trustworthy voices to manage her perception. That what she thought of as events happening in the world which are then being reported on by serious, objective, journalists, is a big fat lie. That what happens is typically manufactured and then spun to keep humans in a low-frequency loop of ignorance and fear and that she could break out of that. (Of course there was no way to say any of that.)

Nonetheless, since she stayed in the conversation so long, (this was new) I thought it it went okay. But since then, she won’t even look at me. Oh, well.

Second anecdote:

We recently received money from a grant, to improve the lives of our residents. (Mostly 70’s plus, low-income.) I requested funds for ‘Museum-lunch outings’ which is exactly how it sounds. Residents benefit socially and culturally, and take part in something they would otherwise not be able to afford to do for themselves.

Our first outing was last week, when I took seven residents to Hartford’s Wadsworth Atheneum. It was a great success. The chatter on the 40 minute drive back to the housing authority was energized and included lots of laughter. And appreciation. Everyone, more than once, expressed how grateful they were and how much they were looking forward to the next outing. (Becka was not part of the group.)

This second anecdote is clearly an example of what continues to work in our world. The benefits of being social, taking advantage of opportunities, expressing gratitude and just having fun. It was all of that.

As a life-strategy all of that is better than carrying around an agenda you’d like imposed on everyone else. Not to mention a litmus test most will fail. You’re not going to find much peace in any of that. Or laughter. And, rare connection.

And yet I’ve done that too, so I can relate to Becka; I’ve carried an agenda for those who I felt were clueless. I wanted to wake people up - and she is doing the same. That we diagnose the cause of the problems of this world very differently doesn’t change that.

And while I certainly enjoyed anecdote 2 better, the 1st was equally important and meaningful if I’m looking to understand what is going on in our world. There are still a lot of Beckas, locked in to a view of the world that is deepening their fear. This dire reality-take leaves little room for lightness, and simple pleasures.

It’s pretty heart-breaking.

All this has me thinking how simple life is before we add our layers of beliefs, assumptions and narrative. Papering over the simple experience of being - the what is - which always precedes the what is going on. It’s available to everyone.

Nature will always point us there.

Being present to direct experience is not an escape from the world. We’ve got it backwards. That’s actually the real and reliable world - always already there - waiting for us. We don’t need to do anything except stop and notice.

What's gone mad is the imposed and fabricated, the pretend world of the insatiable power-hungry, attempting to keep the rest of us controllable while they play their game.

All of that is breaking up. Can you feel it? Like an intricate spider web that will nonetheless be easily blown away in a big enough storm.

Storm, gathering.

Spring is on its way and with it more light each day. Waters are thawing with the warmer temps and the extraordinary-ordinary cycles of Nature continues. We’re fully part of that. Directly part of that.

So reassuring. So welcome.

What is, is miraculous. And worthy of our praise. (The birds know.)

Thanks for reading.

Your support is much appreciated. 💖

https://ko-fi.com/kathleen87247