A Small Moment
with big lessons
Gustav Klimt, 054
Recently I was in a group discussion where someone - not present - was labeled a conspiracy theorist.
The comment was meant, of course, to dismiss this person and her opinion; she was not to be taken seriously.
“She’s a dear friend of mine, but contrary and also she’s a conspiracy theorist.” (I’d hate to hear what this woman would say about her less than ‘dear’ friends, but I digress.)
I raised my eyebrows waiting for more.
“She doesn’t think we landed on the moon, for instance,” was the example offered, accompanied by an exaggerated eye-roll.
What I said next, just came out.
“It’s funny isn’t it? It wasn’t that long ago that we’d call someone like that “open-minded.” Right? I mean there are lot of books by people who do challenge the official moon-landing story. It’s really not that out-there. I just remember when that sort of questioning and curiosity was seen as a positive attribute. It’s amazing how quickly that has changed.”
It went quiet.
Then, slow recognition on her face, followed by, “Yeah, that’s a good point. I do remember that.”
And then we moved on.
It was a small moment but I took away some big lessons.
I made my point in an unthreatening way that could be received.
I included myself in it, not singling her out.
I kept rapport with her - something Peter McLaughlin discussed in this interview with Mike Adams. (Which I had watched a couple days earlier, and wonder if it unconsciously influenced my approach, though I’d like to say I was conscious about it.)
I didn’t need to make her wrong to make my point. (Something my sister has talked with me about.)
I kept a good connection with this person - neither of us left with a negative feeling.
I imagine many of us are looking for ways to integrate what happened over the last few years; re-establish damaged relationships; maintain ongoing ones. I’ve put my hammer away - turns out it wasn’t a very effective means of communication anyway :-) - though I can’t stay quiet either. Finding ways to say what you need without generating division is so key now.
I enjoyed Tereza’s recent post, which is a retrospective rich in reflections.
Anyway my big lessons from this small moment, might all be obvious to you. For me it stands out as real progress. (And I could just be slow.)
And promising. I suspect the combination of my genuine desire to keep connections going, listening to Peter’s interview, and my sister’s comments all conspired - though its just a theory - towards this good result.
And that seemed worth sharing.
Thanks for reading.
https://ko-fi.com/kathleen87247
Lately I have as prob with some conspiracy theorists more than those who aren't.
My sister is one of the most beautiful people, has a beautiful kind heart. She is patient and listens to conspiracies, doesnt always agree but keeps an open mind and agrees on some topics. She traveled to watch the eclipse. It brought her to tears. I can only imagine how incredible it was for her and her girls to see it. Then I got on substack where someone called eclispe watchers "apes."
Seriously? Is this the welcome people have to offer someone like my sister? It's little wonder people give "conspiracy theories" a wide berth when they get accusations and name calling for experiencing a magical astrological event. It makes me wonder why I am here sometimes.
Bravo. We are surrounded by this all the time, and it matters a lot that we keep challenging it. Sensitiivy and with humility, as you did. I just finished reading Mattias Desmet's 'Psychology of Totalitarianim' for the second time. It is a really amazing book, giving the best explanation I have seen of how and why the world got to where it is, and what we can do about it. And 'not turning a blind eye' to the strange mental patterns developing in the general population is top of the list.